Life as we know it...

has changed for good. And I don't really mean 'changed for good' as in 'changed for the better'. I mean it in more of a 'we're never going back to that sweet spot, are we?' kind of way.

That is to say the diapers of a breast-fed baby were, in retrospect, the sweet spot of parenthood. Today I experienced my first diaper change of a spoon-fed baby. Incidentally, one who had not pooped since last Friday. Thus, feeding upon feeding upon prunes upon feeding upon more prunes, came out in one mass exodus shortly after 11:00 this morning. Ay. I am still catching phantom whiffs of it now as I type.

Needless to say (because really, isn't it obvious that my boy adores milk?), Leo loves loves loves to eat. He is crazy about carrots, squash, oatmeal, rice cereal, grapes, apples, peaches, watermelon, orange juice, lemons, prunes (see above) and just about anything else we let him suck on. Oh, that would include celery. He doesn't swallow the majority of this list, but he sure loves to suck on it. He is such a delight. He passed out in his Bumbo yesterday just moments after his last bite of mashed up lunch. Luis and I are falling more in love with our son every day.

Also on the list of things Leo loves are baths, Johnny Jump Up, babbling in the morning, Daddy, the little red fox toy from IKEA, his ears and his toes. I took him to his first story time at the library last week, I was so impressed by his attentiveness to the stories and interaction with the other children. We even got to make a bat hat in commemoration of the story time theme; Things That Fly In the Night! I feel so very thankful to my sweet Husbie for supporting me in staying home with our son. I can't imagine missing the seconds and minutes and hours of this sweet life with Leo.

Don't mess with a man...

and his monkey.

It's nearly 3:00...

in the afternoon. I've eaten nothing but a piece of toast today. I think I brushed my teeth earlier, but I can't be sure. The load in the dryer has been there since, oh, Tuesday? Not sure on that either. But it is dry. I think. But, see... I'm in love. When you're in love, you forget to eat. You care more about time with that person than keeping up with the laundry. Or, in some extreme cases, brushing your teeth. Maybe not that last one. But the Object of My Affection, well, he doesn't care about my breath. Or clean underwear. Or fresh towels. Because he loves me too. A lot. In fact, he loves just about everybody. Especially his pappy. And milk. Oh, how he adores milk. Would you like to meet him?

Yes, I am in love with Leo. He is a dream in diapers. A sweetie in spit. A doll in drool. A treat in tennies. A blessing in blankies. A love in layette. A wonder in one-sies.

I came across an amazing woman's blog today. Her 18-month old daughter drowned in a canal this summer. This woman's writing was full of faith. As I read, I held my son and kissed his cheeks, wiped his bubbles, squeezed his tummy. Someone asked her what would she have done differently if she had to do it over again. She said she would have kept better journals of her time with her baby. I felt, how do you say, pricked. Right in the heart. I have spent four amazing months day in and day out with my son, and I don't want to forget a moment of it. Already it passes too quickly.

He is a joy. I don't know how to say it any more or any better than that. He. Is. A. Joy. A delight. So full of love for his parents. So grateful for every diaper and feeding. So ready with a smile. He is precious above all that is precious. He has redefined my existence. He is, if it is not too bold to say, the measure of my creation. He is the manifestation of God's love for His children. He is the sun, the moon, the stars. He is the universe. He is, to quote someone more eloquent than I, my heart beating outside of my body. It is the greatest honor of my life to be Leo's mama. Honestly.

And his father?! Well, that's an entirely lengthy prose worthy of its own post. Luis has been amazing, to say the least. He adores his son. He adores me. I am blessed. And deeply, deeply grateful. And that, my friends, is where happiness resides. Here on Lincoln Street, with Tres Bonillas completely in love.

Week Three and Four

Two Weeks

Ahhh, sweet second week... Our little Leo blessed me with several nights in a row of 5-hour sleeps. What a rock star! I couldn't believe how 'human' I felt after a couple of nights of longer sleeps myself. It didn't last through the third week, but I sure was grateful for it while it lasted.

I also experienced my first four-alarm diaper in the second week! I always thought it funny that Leo has peed and pooped on his dad a number of times, but never on me. That changed... I was on speaker phone with my friend when it happened, pee in a perfect arch, landing exactly on my cell phone! And then the poops started. Oh, the poops. It was an adventure. I didn't know which end to start at! Sweet baby, he was amused methinks.

In the second week he showed us how strong he is by rolling over on his play mat, putting his weight on his feet when we held him, and pressing his little feet against my arm to stop me from tickling his delicious toes. His neck is really strong as are his stubborn little arms, which he likes to keep right up by his face when he nurses. That's proven to be challenging for Mom to wrestle little fingers, a hungry mouth, a nursing bra, and the Boppy pillow all at once, but it's always good for some laughs.

Also in the second week I felt I got to see a beautiful and emerging side of my sweet husbie. He was supposed to return to work in the second week, but the mere thought of his return left me in a pool of tears, unable to function. Despite all the compelling economic reasons he SHOULD have returned, he took another week off to help me stabilize a bit. Indeed, the second week is when my baby blues hit. Lots of weeping in this week, but I always had a strong shoulder to cry on and a beautiful son to focus on. The biggest melt down happened when I was trying to fill my water bottle while balancing it on my knee and holding Leo in the other arm. Of course, the bottle dropped and water went all over the kitchen floor, at which point it seemed perfectly appropriate to burst into a flood of tears and fall apart. Luis came to the rescue; he gently guided me to the couch, brought me a box of Kleenex, took the baby, and mopped up the kitchen floor. Heaven help the mama...

I have loved watching Luis as a father. He is ever patient, loving, attentive, and devoted. He makes up silly songs, dances with our baby, tells him stories, talks him through diaper changes, and constantly tells him that his mama is beautiful. I couldn't be more pleased with my mate. He is wonderful.

Other than the weepies, the second week was magical and sweet. Lots of down time as a family, our first walk around the block, visits from family and friends, and continuing the life-long and wonderful process of falling in love, again and again and again.

One Week

Our sweetest little heart at exactly one week old... I'm going to have to work backwards here a bit to bring us up to date, as I can't believe that sleeping peacefully in his room at the moment is our almost four week old son. Motherhood is amazing, as was giving birth, both of which will be addressed in a future post. For now, I'll fill you in on the last few weeks.

So, week one. Our first week with a baby was incredible, enchanting, magical, and challenging. Lui and I were both anxious to get home from the hospital and out of the constant stream of nurses, doctors, and interruptions, so we checked out a day early and brought Leo home the day after I gave birth. We arrived home on May 6th, around 6:30pm, to a welcoming party of my mom and step-dad and Lui's parents, visiting from Mexico. Mom had prepared her signature "home from the hospital" dish of homemade chicken soup with dumplings, wheat bread, stew, cornbread and salad. We ate dinner together in a bit of a sleep-deprived daze and marveled at this little angel we call our son.

The first few nights at home, Luis and I weren't sure how exactly you get a newborn to sleep. Like, where does he sleep? How long should he sleep? How do I keep him asleep? Etc., etc., etc. I was up with the babe every hour and a half for the first few nights (which thankfully has stretched to every three hours now), and will forever treasure in my heart those first few early morning hours alone with my baby. I literally felt the presence of heaven in our home and loved the quietness of getting to know my son, feeding him in the stillness of the wee early hours.

Leo was healthy from the day he was born, and his first week was full of perfect advances. He made all the messy and wet diapers he was supposed to make, he ate every ounce he was supposed to eat, and he melted his parents' hearts just as he was sent here to do. By the fourth or fifth night, he started sleeping a bit better and settling into more of a routine with his feedings. Our home was so peaceful in that first week, full of flowers and family and
sleepiness.

His first visit to the doctor found him in good health, with a bit of jaundice that we watched closely for a couple of weeks, but with a strong body and a healthy set of lungs. He was born with curly hair and big eyes and a sweet, sweet disposition. We at first couldn't tell who he looked like, but as he's grown he's definitely becoming his daddy's son.

Luis was home with me the entire first week and I look back on that time now with a sense of nostalgia... the three of us becoming a family, the three of us falling in love, the three of us feeling the weight and the anticipation and the dream and the miracle of it all...

Oh yes, week one was sweet indeed. Welcome home, baby boy.

Tres Bonillas!!

It's official. We're having ourselves a ... a ... well, the deal is, we don't know!! Look forward to an announcement in May and ultrasound pictures coming soon!!

Lots of love from the Casa de Bonilla,
Ali